Breaking Down Gender Dysphoria
Updated: Mar 20
You’re told these changes are normal and that while they’re scary now, you’ll be happy with them soon. You see people around you impressed at how deep your male friend's voice has gotten, or a group of girls bragging to each other with pride about how their boobs are coming in. While the other girls seem excited, you try to hide your breasts with overly tight bras or baggy sweatshirts. While the other boys nod approvingly at each other’s changes, you strain your voice trying to hide yours. For many young trans youth, this is the reality of living with gender dysphoria.
Gender Dysphoria refers to the unease or discomfort a person faces due to their physical traits unaligning with their gender identity. It’s important to note that not all transgender individuals have this condition, and it is not a requirement to identify as trans. This condition is also not a “social contagion” but rather a mismatch of the self regarding gender and the image a person has in their mind.
While gender dysphoria is typically something transgender people face, anyone can experience it. For example, a woman could be upset about a botched pixie cut, because she feels shame and discomfort about looking like a man. Now, while we go fetch her a hat to alleviate her dysphoria, let’s talk about the difference between gender dysphoria and body dysmorphia.
Body dysmorphia is a condition in which an individual perceives a part of themself as flawed. These flaws are often minor or entirely unperceivable by peers. However unnoticeable they are, these flaws are often distressing enough to create embarrassment and shame for the person who experiences them. This condition is unrelated to gender and is treated by medication and therapy. Body dysmorphia cannot be reliably treated by surgery because the flaws are often imaginary or the feelings just transfer to a different part of the body.
Gender dysphoria, on the other hand, is often treated by modifying the body to better align with the internal gender identity a person has. This can be done in several ways ranging from social transition with a gender-affirming haircut to pursuing medical transition with hormones or surgery. While therapy may help some people alleviate their gender dysphoria, transition is usually the most effective option.
Anti-trans advocates confuse these two disorders and argue that those, especially young individuals, who are uncomfortable with their gender have body dysmorphia, when in reality, they may be facing gender dysphoria. This is often used as an excuse against medical intervention of any kind. (Authors Note: Just a reminder that young children are not able to get gender-affirming surgery, and never have. Medical intervention is rarely given at all before the onset of puberty.)
Now that we’ve established what gender dysphoria is and isn’t, how can we deal with it? Unfortunately, gender-affirming care through medical intervention is hard to access and can be incredibly expensive with costs ranging from $6,900 and $63,400 depending on the procedure. If finances are primarily what is holding you back, please note that many foundations linked at the bottom of the post have surgery funds you can apply to.
Regardless of your situation, the most common way to deal with gender dysphoria is through social transition. This usually takes the form of assuming a new name and pronouns that align with your gender identity. This works best if you can surround yourself with people that accept you. If you are in an unfortunate situation and feel you cannot express yourself, online groups can be a great way to build a supportive community. Trevorspace, run by the Trevor Project, is just one of many platforms dedicated to exactly that.
If you want to pursue physical changes without surgery, gender-affirming products like chest binders and packers can help. These products can mask already existing secondary-sex characteristics or provide the external appearance of desired characteristics. If financials or confidentiality is an issue, there are several charities dedicated to providing these products for free in subtle packaging shipped to pick-up locations or right to your door. The resources mentioned earlier also provide these services.
If you’re an ally to the trans community and want to help, these charities are a great place to donate money to help trans people across the US. On a smaller scale, gender-affirming acts can be done by providing clothing to gender-affirming clothing closets in many LGBTQ resource centers. Other acts, like making an effort to use the preferred name and pronouns for people around you can be helpful to alleviate dysphoria. Most importantly, listen to the people in your life. Being trans is scary in today’s society, and knowing that someone is there to support you, regardless of the route they take, is incredibly important.
Care should be accessible to all.